No, these guys weren't doing their social networking online. They were playing star wars lego games. Very serious, world changing star wars lego games, apparently.
I'm pondering. What kind of name is "facebook?" I realize it's catchy and modern and edgy... but it doesn't have anything to do with the site. There are no faces (unless you upload one, I guess) and it's not a book. Facebook makes me think of a phonebook that has the pictures of everyone listed. Is that what facebook was created for? To be a listing of people's faces and information in order to contact them?
I guess it makes a little sense. But I still don't like it.
Oh well.
Anyway, I'm wondering today about whether our obsession with online social interaction is a positive or negative influence on our relationships or perhaps both. I'm also wondering if that sentence was properly constructed, but only my sister would have noticed if it wasn't until I decided to point it out...
I'm a bit rambly today. I suppose you could tell. It's probably a good idea to refrain from blogging when rambly. It's probably also a good idea to resist the urge to make up words. Blog wasn't even a word till a few years ago, so you never know when you're going to create the next new thing. Or... word. I wonder if all the teenagers will soon be saying "rambly." Not that all the teenagers think I'm altogether that cool.
I really need to stop. I should probably do some backspacing as well but I won't, because I'm just that lazy today. Hey, "backspacing." I made up another word. I'm so creative.
All right, I'll get to the point. Is facebook the creator of new friendships, the sustainer of old ones, and the builder of the established? Or is facebook creating a society that hides behind computer screens and increasingly finds it difficult to talk to people face-to-face, one-on-one?
Here are my thoughts.
Yes. To both.
What? I have to explain? Alright.
Facebook has helped me make some new friends. There are people in my circle that were too shy to talk to me and I took their shyness for revulsion so I didn't talk to them, because I'm a bit "shy" myself in some ways. So becoming friends on facebook and realizing all the things we had in common gave them and me the courage to talk in person. So now, I've got a few friends I wouldn't have had otherwise.
Facebook has helped me to find long lost friends. My high school principal (the awesome kind of principal,) my close friend who grew up down the street from me, my old piano teacher, one of the boys in my class all the way through school, my two best buds in college. You all have these stories too. In fact, there aren't too many people from my past I wasn't able to find on facebook. I wouldn't have any connection to these people or even know where they are if it weren't for facebook.
Facebook has sustained present relationships. I hate the phone. Those of you that have called me know I don't answer it all the time. I don't even respond to messages sometimes that clearly say "please call me back at this number." I send a facebook message instead. I know, it's a little weird to have a phone phobia. If you also have one please let me know I'm not alone. Or else I might have to have myself commited to overcome my irrational fear of telecommunications.
So I facebook people instead. I suppose this is because I am far more confident behind my written words than my spoken. And if that's weird then I willingly own my weirdness.
But I also think it's possible for facebook to come between people if you let it. If you never talk face to face, if you never have that human contact that grows you as a person, if you never learn to read other people's body language, their expressions... well, that's all part of knowing someone else.
So that's my two cents for the day. I'm sorry I'm not wealthy in wisdom and able to provide 25 cents or 50.
If you've got anything to add, start typing!
AHHHH, i DESPISE the phone!! it took me 45 minutes to make myself call you the other day, and while it was ringing i was kinda hoping you wouldn't answer! ;) bryan asked if we should wait since you weren't home, and i said, 'oh no, i'm pretty sure she's home...' :)
ReplyDeleteif it weren't for texting and the computer, i would pretty much never talk to anyone! there are finally a FEW (like...2?) people i don't mind calling, but i still have reservations every time i dial.
but i can talk forever on text or facebook/email. :)
so you are not alone in the phone hatred/fear! :)
as for everything else on this post, i agree. i've made so many friends (and closer friendships) through it, but the personal face-to-face time is important too!
and i'm glad you're one of the friends i've gotten to actually KNOW! :)
thanks for writing!!
Yes, Amy, I completely agree. I think it's safe to say Facebook started our friendship!
ReplyDeleteAnd I was home when you called. But I was nursing, so at least I have that excuse. You'll notice I "facebooked" you back instead of called. :)
i definitely have the phone phobia too, and mine started back in the eighties when the only other way to contact a person was to send snail mail...or an owl. now, thanks to fb, email and texting, i can communicate freely, though not while driving.
ReplyDeletesometimes i'll be texting back and forth with someone and seth will say, "ya know, this conversation could have been cleared up on the phone in about 90 seconds." and then i look at him like he has three eyeballs and i don't really grasp his point. non phone phobics are weird.
you are not alone. I too HATE calling people on the phone. I usually hope to get voicemail. :)
ReplyDeleteIt looks like we pretty much have a consensus. We all hate calling people. I will make a list of people or businesses I need to call during the week and at the end of the week my list is usually untouched. I especially hate calling companies if I'm unsure of exactly what I'm talking about (i.e. making an appt. for a car repair). I usually ignore those until my husband gets exasperated and does it for me. I'm quite sure that a lot of people have taken my reticence (sp?) to call as snobbishness (a new word?), but it's really not that. I just stink at small talk and don't like talking on the phone to people I don't know well. So, that was a very long, wordy reply just to say I don't like the phone either!
ReplyDeleteMidwest Mama, that is EXACTLY how I feel on all counts! :) Sometimes MacGyver gets it into his head that I should face this fear head-on.
ReplyDeleteThat never goes over very well.
Call me.
ReplyDeleteI'm fairly positive that the name "Facebook" came from the nickname that students would give the directory that freshmen were given of other freshmen when they came to college. It was a book of faces with names. We called ours...not me...right...but OTHERS called it the "Chicktionary" at Cedarville. I believe the creators of facebook at Harvard decided to use that name because it was familiar to those on campus. I believe I read that somewhere...or I could be completely wrong.
ReplyDeleteAlso...I hate the phone. I had to call guests for 3 1/2 years in radio and over a year at OMF. I gradually got better at cold calls because I was in control. However, when I'm on the phone with friends, I don't know how to end the conversation. So, I end up sounding rude, quickly saying goodbye, and hanging up.
I would like to comment on the portion you wrote about finding old friends and such. One of the more sour feelings I have about it, I have noticed that a lot of people on Facebook use it as a competition of 'how many friends can I have compared to everyone else'. I am very happy there was no FB while we were in high school, struggling to find ourselves, and leave peer pressure behind. Could you imagine being a teenager today and have the same issues we did, but living it our on FB? It makes me shudder.
ReplyDeleteThough I personally have no problem with talking on the phone to people, I believe that any form of communication is better that none. My sister and I live 2,000 miles apart, and very different lives. For the most part, FB is the only communication I have with her, so I am grateful for that much.
Good thoughts today, thanks for being so open! For the record, I remember you being very talkative back in the early 80's, and I appreciate that ;-)
Gwen - ha.
ReplyDeleteJared... Chicktionary... hahaha. And yes. I am very rude on the phone. I hang up on telemarketers. I say "thank you for calling" and hang up on them while they are talking. I'm awful.
Corina, that's an interesting point. I can imagine fb for teenagers is a much different story than for adults. Having peer pressure at school and then coming home to fb and having more peer pressure - that's a lot of pressure.
And yes, I was more talkative then. Especially with you, because you and I were tight. :) But even in general I was more of an extrovert as a child, and now I have become more of an introvert. Weird, I know.
I feel exactly the same way about the phone!! Tracy D.
ReplyDelete